


There's So Many Voices

by bubble_bobb



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Crying, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Sad, Self-Doubt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-13
Updated: 2019-01-13
Packaged: 2019-10-09 17:58:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17411546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bubble_bobb/pseuds/bubble_bobb
Summary: Jisung misses him, but he understands.He wants him, but won't get any time soon.Changbin is just so busy and out of Jisung's reach that he thinks that, Changbin doesn't feel the same anymore.





	There's So Many Voices

**Author's Note:**

> (Look, I was never good at summaries)  
> Hi!  
> I hope you like this, whatever  
> (Short I know, I feel so emo after writing this, and yes, yet another BinSung, because I love them)  
> Feel free to leave kudos or a comment, maybe?  
> I always love reading what you think  
> Love ya❤

Jisung sobs and presses his knees closer to his chest, letting out a quiet sigh. It's not like he doesn't get it, of course he does, he himself is tired all the time.

So many practices and hours spent on lyrics and music in general really gets a person tired, but he didn't know it would be like this.

He loves Changbin, oh God he would do anything for the older boy, it's just that the distance between them is getting bigger and bigger.

Changbin comes to the dorms later and later every day. And Jisung understands, he really does, he just misses his hyung so bad.

He looks over his shoulder, being met with Changbin's back. They used to goof around all the time. They used to be so _so_ close.

What is happening to them?

 

Everything feels like it's falling apart.

Jisung keeps thinking about their so called 'relationship' for the rest of the month and everything just feels so long and so wrong to him.

He just wants his normal, happy life back. He wants to feel warm and wanted. He wants to feel complete, but without Changbin by his side like he used to be, he doesn't think he can.

Everything around him is loud and sometimes it's just too quiet. Sometimes he feels like it's too much but sometimes like it's not enough.

There's something, in the back of his head, telling him that this is the reason why. The reason Changbin doesn't talk to him as much, or at all. 

Telling him he's not good enough. Sometimes telling him he's overreacting. Telling him to do better. Work harder.

So he tries working harder, maybe he's just not trying enough.

He takes more dance classes, practices at any given chance, takes time to practice singing and rapping from time to time as well.

Though everything stops when he once wakes up on the couch in their living room when he clearly remembers being in the practice room just a minute ago, drinking from his water bottle.

 

He looks around and sees Chan sitting next to him with a worried look settled on his face.

"Jisung ah, is everything okay? You've been so into practicing lately and now..."

The young rapper frowns, Chan always got to the point and didn't walk around but this felt odd. He forces a smile and sits up with Chan's eyes still following him.

"Of course! I just, need to work on myself a little more, nothing else."

Jisung says and looks at the leader with his smile falling off his face. Chan nods, the frown still on his face, and stands up while patting Jisung's shoulder so gently the younger barely feels it.

"Please, just don't overwork yourself, please."

Chan says in a whisper and Jisung nods, still looking up at Chan, maybe he should practice a little less, but what if he does something wrong?

That would mean he didn't do enough. And everyone would blame it on him not practicing enough.

God, why does this have to be so hard?

Jisung stands up when he hears the door to Chan's room close shut and heads into the kitchen slowly, his legs shaking slightly. He takes out a glass from the cabinet and pours water into it. He puts the glass up to his lips and looks at the couch again. His backpack is there together with his phone and wallet. Did he pass out? Is that why he's back at the dorm?

When he's done drinking he slowly walks over to their dinner table and sits down. He doesn't want to think about Changbin right now, he should be worried about what happened to him, hell he just woke up in their living room instead being in the practice room, but, the older has been flooding his mind lately.

It's not like he can complain, it's just that it's never a good thing that comes into his mind. Usually it's the older yelling at him for his mistakes or him simply ignoring Jisung.

The young rapper wipes his eyes when he feels his cheeks getting wet and hot. He's not going to cry now, he has to keep quiet.

Jisung just sighs and stands up to go into the living room and lay down onto the couch again. He closes his eyes, the sound of the clock ticking above the door calming him and putting him to rest.

He needs to sleep, at least a little bit, to get his mind off things for a while.

  
  
The next day isn't any better than other days. Changbin would avoid Jisung most of the time and when the younger finally caught up with him he would tell him to go away.

But Jisung doesn't blame Changbin, he shouldn't be disturbing him when he's working anyway.

He just wants to talk to him though.

And so it goes like that the whole day before it's time to rest and go to sleep.

It's almost 2 am when they all get home, Changbin speed walks into his and Jisung's room and shuts the door and the younger can only watch with a slight frown. The others look at each other in worry and confusion but shrug it off few seconds later and Jisung thinks to himself, how?

How can they not care what's happening with Changbin?

Has he always been like that and Jisung just never noticed?

The blonde wishes everyone a good night and goes into their room, silently opening the door.

"Hyung?"

He steps in and closes the door, his eyes tearing up when he doesn't get an answer.

Of course.

Is it something about him that Changbin just simply refuses to talk to him? He doesn't remember doing anything that could change what they had.

Does he still love him like he said he did a few months ago?

Jisung sits down on the floor, his back resting against a wall. This is all too much for him. He never wanted this to happen.

The rapper rests his head against the wall and looks at Changbin's bed. Tears roll down his cheeks as he smiles a little, one thing he always used to do when Changbin was already asleep was to go to his bed and lay there for a while or just fall asleep, though now, he is scared Changbin is awake or that he will say something along the lines of "Go away." Or "I'm too tired."

Jisung gets up and sits on the edge of Changbin's bed, looking at the older at first, taking in everything about him, before shaking his head and standing up, deciding he should go to bed.

He freezes when a hand grabs his wrist. He looks down and gulps when he sees Changbin's head is turned to look at him.

"Don't leave, Jisung."

And the younger feels the whole world stop for a minute before it begins to break apart when he hears the shakiness in Changbin's voice and sees tears pool up in his shiny eyes.

"Please." 

The younger nods, climbing over the older rapper and laying beside him on the bed without a second thought. Changbin strokes his cheek, hot tears rolling down his own.

Why is Changbin crying?

Jisung doesn't know either, does he want to know though?

Jisung leans into his touch, his eyes closing slowly. Oh God he missed this so much.

"I would never."

Changbin nods slightly, pulling Jisung closer, the younger burying his head into Changbin's chest. He doesn't need more words from Changbin.

He doesn't need an explanation why the older has been avoiding him for the past month or so.

No.

All he really needs and wants right now, is Changbin to just hold him tightly and never let him go, ever.

"Promise?"

Changbin breathes out and Jisung nods, his fingers curling in Changbin's shirt.

But he wants something more, he doesn't know what, but even though this is a lot, it certainly is not enough for him.

Even though he doesn't need, or want in that matter, some kind of explanation or apology, it's not enough to make up for what happened.

The older rapper lays his head on top of Jisung's, pressing his lips against the top of his head and closing his eyes.

"I love you, Sungie. I really, really do. And I'm sorry."

There.

That's it.

That's what Jisung wanted. Those simple words that can make him feel so warm and fuzzy inside, feel like he is going to melt.

That, what makes them remember that they are something more than just friends.

Something more than just band mates. 

That they were made for each other and each other only.

**Author's Note:**

> Talk to me on Twitter? (@bangchanlovebug)  
> I'd love to be friends ^^


End file.
